Straight from the Hip

Most hipsters I know or know of come from, at the very least, middle class backgrounds. They wouldn't be able to sit around pretending to be poor if they didn't. Or else they would be poor and would need a job. More than any contemporary subculture, hipsters are the bane of my existence. I can't stand them. I know that I'm generalizing in this post and I suppose I could be a bit more open minded. But I can't. I hate them for their superficiality and their patronization of lower classes.

My qualms with hipsterdom are many and varied but here are a few. They're poachers. They like to think of themselves as anti-establishment and anti-status quo. Many hipsters come from middle/upper class backgrounds yet strive to give the impression that they come from more "modest" backgrounds. We all know that your faux poverty status is artificial. Furthermore, they poach styles and traits from working class/lower classes in order to "not be mainstream" Take for instance the ubiquitous Pabst Blue Ribbon on tap at your local hipster joint. Trucker hats are another example. (I confess, that I used to have one, a few years ago. But it was poached. Literally.) Hipsters try to identify with lower classes through the most superficial means that it becomes patronizing. Whether the intent to patronize is there or not, I can't say, it's still degrading nonetheless.

You can always tell that you're nearing hipsterdom when you start to get whiffs of that arrogance they all exude. I'm not talking about their physical smell that comes about from not showering. What I'm talking about is the attitude most hipsters have towards anyone who likes anything they do. As soon as something they like becomes popular, it's uncool to them. Anyone who likes anything mainstream is already not cool.

The best part about hipsterdom, and I'm sure that most hipsters appreciate the irony (they love irony, by the way), is that they're rebelling against something they don't want to change. If they actually acted out against what they say they oppose, there would remain nothing left for them to be in opposition to. Hence, as much as they hate the established, commercialized status quo, they need it to thrive in order to complain and bitch and moan and go about their ironic hipster ways. Basically hipsters want to emulate the counterculture of the 60's without changing the political or social atmosphere. I once read a quote stating rebels complain but revolutionaries act. They don't act out against anything because they're narcissistic. What they care about is being cool by isolating themselves through shallow trends.

The main pet peeve I have with hipsters is being labeled as one because I enjoy independent tastes. I like indie music and films, I prefer not to shop at commercial chains, but I do out of convenience and the like. Independent expression and individualism are great things to any culture. Many significant cultural achievements stem from such characteristics. The great thing about independent labels (be it music or film), is that they provide an outlet for a niche demographic. Before the birth of the user driven internet, most people only had a few choices for the music they wanted to hear or the movies they wanted to see. Now, with Web 2.0, basically anyone can make music or movies, allowing for an exponential increase in creative output. What this means is that I (and everyone else) have many more options to choose from than the previous "status quo" fare. This does not mean that we are hipsters.

Apparently, the first commandment of hipsterdom is: never admit to being one. By that logic, hipsters don't exist. How cleverly ironic. Going with the irony, hipsters probably support the war, like George Bush, are racists because most people aren't, support the genocide in Darfur, want global warming, like cancer, hate Conan O'Brien, and enjoy this rant. So hipsters, as Wayne Campbell once said: Game on.